He is such a slut. More and more my type.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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