Who wears a wallet chain?!
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
