I am puke
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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