With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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