It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
