I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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