I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
