i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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