Screwed.edu
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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