I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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