i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
