you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
