she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
