No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
