That's intense
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
