I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
