Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
