As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize