Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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