well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
