Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
