We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
