Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
