you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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