It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
