I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
he laminated a picture of his dick.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize