dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
