I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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