There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
