At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Well I just put wine in my tea
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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