Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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