Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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