Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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