I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
