look no pants
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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