that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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