whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Randomize
