Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
