Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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