It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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