Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize
