It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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