He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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