I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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