I wannas sexs uuuuu
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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