Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
