I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
