Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss

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(909): View more from California

You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie

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(765): View more from Indiana

I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.

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(914): View more from New York

ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol

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(612): View more from Minnesota

i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day

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(951): View more from California

His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format

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(360): View more from Washington

If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.

(503): View more from Oregon

Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!

(360): View more from Washington

A cheater.

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(206): View more from Washington

That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.

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