You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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