My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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